August 25th

I recently had a frightening and shocking experience - I was without knitting - I know it was shocking for me as well.

Last night I had to go to a meeting at my daughters school about an overnight trip that her class will be taking. As I walked out the door it occurred to me that I didn't have a project in my bag (that's not completely true - I do have a finished chemo cap - my 3rd one - but it's more or less done - I only need to pull the end through the last 8 stitches and weave in the end - but that's done right?) POINT - I didn't have a current project in my bag. I paused for a moment when I was running out the door and I thought - if I stop to find something that's been abandoned I will be late - this was immediately followed by the thought - if I try to find a new project, I will never make it out the door tonight - so with the intention of trying to be a good parent (it's a stretch for me) I immediately left for the meeting. I consoled myself with the though of "there will be paperwork to fill out" how bad could it be? My friends, do not let this happen to you. I was fine for the first 15 minutes, I did have paperwork to do, but the next 30 minutes were excruciating, I don't know how the woman next to me restrained herself from not smacking me into unconsciousness. I fidgeted, I wiggled, I looked around, a toddler turned loose in a toy store is better behaved than I am. I will give myself credit for not throwing myself on the floor and announcing "I'M BORED" but other than that I was not really paying attention. It's funny I don't realize how focused knitting keeps me until I don't have it. I love the people that give you a horrified look when you go to a lecture/meeting/anything where there will not be other knitters who understand you, and pull out your knitting. One of the best comebacks I have ever heard was "I don't listen with my hands", and to be honest, if my hands aren't busy I apparently don't listen with my brain. Oh, I heard what they were saying, but it was filtered through the thoughts of all of the other things that I could have been doing at that moment. Isn't it funny that people think that you aren't paying attention when your hands are busy, but the truth is (for me anyway) when my hands are busy my brain engages completely with what is being said, rather than playing with all of the other shiny things bouncing around in there. Please like I don't have shiny things bouncing around in my head, everything in there is shiny how could it not be with the sparks that it creates as it ricochets off the inside of my skull. Sort of like fireworks.... Pretty.... even now, have realized that I have completely lost focus, sorry. (and as an aside why isn't there an "e" in shiny - I think that it would look prettier spelled shiney - look really focus now - pulling it back in)

So you know that I came home and immediately cast on a pair of socks, that was the one good thing that came out of the meeting. They really want us to send the kids on the trip with wool socks, and that's all of the encouragement that I need. So a pair of socks are on the needles, and I am thinking that my son keeps asking for his hat, so I am going to cast that on as well. That's right - two travel projects! You have no idea how frightening and upsetting this was for me, I have definitely learned my lesson and will not be caught without emergency / travel knitting again!

What's in your bag?

Thursday - July 16th

Life - I wish that there were more hours in a day and I wish that I was better with time management. Maybe it's a knitter thing. I am very organized in some areas of my life, but in others I could not be more flaky. I have every intention of blogging at least once a week - really - that's my plan - but then life runs off with me and I realize that it's once again been a month since I wrote anything.

I say that perhaps this is a knitter thing because I do often have the same trouble being faithful to one project, starting that great new camisole at the beginning of spring only to finally finish it on the same day that we see the first snow (won't be wearing that anytime soon). I know judging from the things that I hear from other knitters it's a very common problem, flitting from one project to another. Add to the project jumping (wrote unfaithfulness and thought seems unfair to say that I am cheating on one sweater with another - like they will know that I have favorites) so, in addition to the project jumping like most of you I have a job and kids and a house that I occasionally need to clean (please note that I do not say "want to clean") and I just don't have enough hours in the day to get things done. It really doesn't help that my fall back position is knitting.

Feeling overwhelmed with everything that I need to do, perfect time to put on my pajama's, climb into bed put on a movie and knit for a couple of hours until the feeling passes. The fact that my 11 year old frequently joins me (am I doing her a favour or a disservice passing this trait along?) makes me feel that I am able to self soothe with knitting and spend time with my daughter, the entire thing feels very decadent and heavenly.

But that brings me back to my point - I have decided that life doesn't have to be a balance - and who decided that we have to balance things. I have decided that if you have it "all" what else is there to want. Isn't there something to be said for having something that needs to be done? gives you a reason to get out of bed and be motivated, otherwise I would pile my bed high with yarn and knit my way out...... Besides the house is always going to need to be cleaned - someone is always going to have a shirt or pants or pair of socks that need to be washed (although the rule of "once you are 12 you do your own laundry" has freed up quite a bit of time at my house - my daughter only has 6 more months of laundry service - wonder how many stitches are in a load of her laundry?) The garage is a mess - but I can get two cars in there so really how tidy does it need to be? Once my kids are gone and I am alone (what a sad thought that is) I will have all of the time in the world to finally tidy and organize my garage, office, basement. But today, today I am going home to knit.

Thursday - June 4th, 2009

I am a complete yarn w***e completely incapable of being faithful to any one project. The Lace top and the Camisole (out of Premiere) held my interest for a long time (at least three weeks and that has to be a record with me). But while I was working on my lace top I have also been knitting on my hat (out of Calmer) for my chemo caps, after all I need a project that I can take with me when I need to be on the go, and nothing is better than a hat. So I have already been two-timing. BUT a very nice woman came into the shop on Thursday (June 4th) and asked if she were to purchase a ball of yarn would someone be able to knit a toddler hat for her. Before I even realized that I was forming a response the answer was out of my mouth "Of course I can".

I should also say that I then proceeded to encourage her to purchase a ball of wool...... not cotton (yes I know that it's June - have you seen the hail out there?) or acrylic, but good, solid, beautiful, natural, reliable wool, there really is nothing better than a good wool cap.

As soon as she left I casted on and started to knit only to realize that I needed to put the June Calendar on the web site, so I was a good store owner, stopped kitting and took care of that, with the thought in my head that I am going away this weekend and I would have time to finish the hat then.

Sure enough, on Saturday, on my flight to Seattle (I was surprising my sister for her 40th birthday) I finished the hat, it was a baby hat after all. On the flight home I finished my first Odessa hat (for the chemo caps) and started my second. So now I am three hats down in one weekend, but feeling slightly guilty that I have completely abandoned other things. But did I mention that I finished two hats? that has to count for something right? Does it make it worse that I completely dumped my current projects for the quickie baby hat? If I promise that I am going back to them does that make up for things, even if just a little?

Saturday May 23rd

Hi, my name is Jen, and I am a knitter...... The other night I went to dinner with a friend, and I arrived a little early, so while waiting for her to finish her hair, I sat on the couch and whipped out my knitting (am currently carrying a hat - my new favorite transport project). Once we got to the restaurant, she needed the ladies room and the food hadn't arived yet, so I found myself alone at the table and you know that hat popped out again. When my friend came back she said "I can't believe that you are knitting" to which I replied "why wouldn't I? It's what I do". She then went on to ask why I didn't just surf the net on my phone, and I thought that this question made absolutely no sense. Why would I surf the web? First of all I don't have a data package for my cell phone - so it's costs me a small fortune, not to mention WHY? I can't think of anything that I would want to look at / for on the world wide web (well except, I do still need to find something to do with the possum, but I think that I have that worked out as well). I think that everyone knows where I stand on the internet, and that I am not a fan of twitter (I still don't understand wanting to know what anyone else is doing at any moment of the day) so why would I surf the web, why wouldn't I knit, and then I had this amazing and beautiful thought..... What if we could get everyone knitting, instead of playing with their phones during down time - what if they knit, yes I know that we would run out of wool if that happened, but still it's a beautiful thought and one that I am definitely hanging on to. So I realized that knitting is my outlet - and could help explain why I am not as into the internet - I barely have the time to knit don't have the time to play on the net. Not that I needed any of this reassurance, the fact that I have chosen to surround myself with yarn should have been my first clue..... With all of this said - am now going back to my knitting

May 19th

I recently had someone bring me possum yarn. This yarn came all the way from Australia, where it is plentiful. I thought (incorrectly) that you couldn't get possum yarn in the states because it was banned. Turns out that I had that wrong..... oops..... But it is still interesting yarn, I did a little research and this is what I turned up:

• The possum fur used in making yarn is not from the same type of possum that we have in the states - this possum is cute and soft and other than the whole "it's a pest destroying the natural forests in New Zealand" I think that they are adorable. The possum we have in the states is apparently stinky and greasy and you wouldn't want to use it's fur for anything (and don't some people eat it as road kill or is that just a joke?)
• Possum yarn comes from New Zealand where they have a massive possum problem


• Possums are protected in Australia


• Possums are eating native trees in New Zealand


• Possums are disturbing the native birds by eating the trees the birds also eat - except the birds consume the trees at a MUCH slower rate


• By eating native trees the possums are also eating the homes of native birds.


• Possums have been caught on camera eating kokako eggs and chicks.


• Possums have even been known to push kiwi out of their burrows so they can have a dry place to sleep! - this is my favorite reason to dislike the possums - can you imagine kicking someone out of bed, so that you can have a place to sleep....... Do think less of me that this reason endears the possum to me just a little more........


• Sometimes possums will eat native land snails .


• Possums can spread a disease called 'bovine tuberculosis' to cows, cattle and deer.


• Possums are noisy and can keep people awake, and they have been known to go inside houses! - I think that they might have made this up or added it just to prove a point

If you want to check my sources for these facts go here (and for the record I cut and pasted some of the list) : http://www.kcc.org.nz/pests/possum.asp

Now I know that this seems like a harsh attack against the little guys - particularly since I think that they are cute - I like rodents remember? BUT they really are a pest. Apparently they were brought to New Zealand for fur trade but it went awry (the guys that had the brilliant idea of making money off the fur couldn't turn a profit) so the possums were released into the wilds of New Zealand where they have no natural predators and due to that and their insatiable appetites they are destroying natural forests (sort of reminds me of my house - how does my son eat an entire bag of potato chips in 15 minutes). I agree that they need to be stopped and yay for me if I can get a yarn out of it. I won't tell you how they get the yarn - sort of takes the fun out of it but I will say this about the yarn it's very interesting:

• The yarn is typically mixed with wool (all yarn should have some component of wool - yes I know that my personal love affair with wool is making me biased)
• Possum fur doesn't take dye - yes the yarn can be dyed - but it's the base yarn / fiber that is actually taking the dye.
• You can see the possum fur when you look at the yarn from the side - you can see the halo of fiber / fur.
• Possum yarn blossoms when blocked, and the fur fibers become exaggerated so essentially you have this furry brown haze surrounding the project / garment - think mohair.....

I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am at the prospect of knitting with this yarn - and even more shocking is the fact that I want to block it - I know I am thinking that I might be ill as well, the concept of me blocking something is almost as foreign as me gauging - but I guess in some aspects I am finally becoming a grown up knitter.

Now my biggest issue is finding the perfect project for this beautiful and amazing yarn - I want something simple so that it shows off the beautiful tweedy quality of the yarn - not to mention the haze that I know is coming. But I don't want it too simple..... just what I need a reason to find a new project and I have too many things going right now as it is.... Am trying to be good and focus on the current projects - but the lure of the possum is great. I'll let you know who wins. I am betting on the possum, after all it is destroying the natural forests of New Zealand it must be very powerful and strong - can not resist the force........

May 14th

I keep writing this post - but then instead of posting it I keep saving it and I can't figure out how to find my drafts..... Maybe this is the real reason that I don't like technology - it's not that I think that it's driving a wedge in society it's that I can't figure out how to use it properly.

So I am nearly finished with the camisole top - had nearly completed one strap only to realize that I dropped a stitch on the first row - it was a knit three together and I only caught two of the three stitches. I had a moment of I could cheater fix it, but then I thought "no, it's only a strap and the rest of the top is lovely, do it properly" so I ripped back. Re-knit the same section, only to do the same thing a second time only this time it didn't hold - the first time I missed the stitch I had to look to see the wayward loop, but the second time the stupid thing actually unraveled. So I started once again, BUT, after knitting a few rows had an epiphany. I had 12 balls of premier (it's this amazingly soft very drapey yarn out of cotton and tencel and quite honestly it's heavenly to work with) and the camisole is supposed to take 6 balls, I also have a lace top that I have been eyeing from last springs Vogue Knitting, that is also done out of premier - 6 balls - and if my math skills don't fail me I have just enough yarn. EXCEPT how often are patterns wrong (even when you are using the yarn they claimed to have used). So I actually am only 5 balls in with the camisole and me in my brilliance decided that now would be a good time to start the lace top. After all - at this point I am only doing the straps, I could do the straps out of a contrasting color, heck I could do them out of ribbon, there is lots of options for straps. But with a top, if you don't have enough yarn you are stuck. So I started the top - No this is not justification for starting a new project, really my reasoning is sound - okay maybe it's a little justification, but still reasoning is sound!

So started the top and had to rip it back as well, mis-read which size I was making and didn't make enough increases - oops - but am back on track and had hoped to post pictures of both garments, except I can't seem to find my battery charger since I came home from England. I know that I brought it back with me - I vaguely remember taking it out of my bag, but for the life of me I don't remember where I put it. As soon as I figure it out - and charge the battery I will post pictures - yes I know - no one is holding their breath!

In the mean time - I am happily knitting away on my top - and when it gets really cold (like last Sunday) I pull out my sweater that I am nearly finished with. I don't quite know what is going on with me that I am sticking to one project at a time (not that I am not ogling, and fondling other yarn for other projects, but I haven't casted anything on yet) but I am going to go with it - it actually seems to be a productive way to knit. Instead of flitting from project to project never really making any headway. If you stick with one thing you can actually see progress and maybe even the end. It's interesting this new state of mind - I wonder how long it will last......

Maybe I have finally found my place of Zen - come join me!

Apologies and Personal Responsibility

So first I need to say I am sorry - I shouldn't blame you for my lack of self control - but I must say that several of you did take pity on me and come down and hang out on Saturday and while I did pull out the yarn to make the sweater it is back in the bin (mocking me for now). I resisted the urge to start yet another sweater and am quite pleased with myself for my restraint (maybe even pleased enough to allow me to pick a new project - and we have gone in a giant circle - I love self indulgence).

I am nearly done with the Camisole that I am knitting out of Premier (it is the softest cotton yarn) and as soon as it's done I will try to get a picture posted. As soon as I am done with it I am going to use the rest of my stash of premier yarn to make this gorgeous sweater from Vogue Knitting. The magazine is currently in the store, I won't allow myself to take it home for fear that me and my short attention span will have it casted on before I knit another stitch on the camisole. I have to say that the warmer weather has inspired me to start knitting for summer and I am very excited about the prospect of lacy cardigans and have already picked out yarn for my next two projects (no the sweater above doesn't count - it's a I've been good treat and special and different) I need the new cardigans I need something to put over all of my cami's this summer..... and more exciting news, I am back at work on the crocheted camisole that I got bored with last summer, now if I can get back to the sweater that I also abandoned last summer I will be in great shape.

This weekend is supposed to be rainy and cold - come see me - even better come see what I am working on, at this point it could be anything!